Being Fat Isn’t the Worst Thing a Person Can Be, Y’unno | #ThisGirlEats

There’s a disturbing narrative that exists today, and we just can’t seem to shake it. It’s simple, really: Fat = Bad. It’s everywhere; we see with advertising selling us slimming products, the press fat-shaming celebrities, and people bombarding social media with before vs. after photos. No matter where we might find it, the message is always the same – being fat is the worst thing you can be.

And I’m so sick of it.

My most recent encounter with this was watching the latest TV ad for Weight Watchers. I can’t remember the exact words and, annoyingly, can’t find the advert anywhere online, but I distinctly remember the spokeswoman telling people to sign up on the basis that it will make them a “better version of themselves” – come to think of it, she might’ve even said the best version of yourself.

Weight Watchers: Wellness that Works (umm…)

Because apparently, thinner ALWAYS equals better.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to lose weight, especially when it’s affecting your health and you think you could be in better shape; hell, I could stand to lose a few pounds myself! But the idea that being slimmer automatically makes you a better person – and, in turn, being bigger somehow detracts from you as an overall human being – is total bullshit.

Not only is it a load of rubbish, but it’s incredibly damaging. Pushing the “fat = bad, thin = good” narrative is bound to have a negative impact, particularly where eating disorders and mental health are concerned. Imagine telling someone with anorexia, for example, that being the thinnest version of themselves makes them the best version of themselves. Or how this could easily recycle that feeling of guilt in someone with bulimia to the point that they experience dangerous symptoms such as binging and purging. It seems so obviously dangerous to me in this context, I’m amazed we allow it to continue.

It’s clearly designed to make us feel terrible about ourselves. Telling us that we’re better when we’re thinner makes those of us whose bodies don’t fit these very particular – and sometimes unobtainable – specifications feel worthless, unattractive and uncomfortable in our own skin. It also strips us of our identities as people; it ignores all other aspects of our personalities and achievements, reducing how we measure up on the “good vs. bad scale” to nothing more than our weight.

I look at photos of myself from a few years back, before I gained the weight I now carry around with me (mostly in my lil’ tummy pooch), and sometimes I’m swept up in that narrative. I look at photos like the one below and think, “Wow, how did I let this version of myself slip away?!” And literally the ONLY reason I think that is because I’m thinner in those photos. That’s it. It’s not based on where I was at that point in my life, or how happy I was, or what I’d achieved. It’s because I was thinner – so I must’ve been better, right?


NO, SAM! Of course not! That’s just such a ridiculous notion, I can’t believe I bought it for even a second! I look at what’s happened in my life since those photos and almost laugh at how absurd I’m being when I think I’m worse off now simply because of my weight. I’ve achieved bucket loads since then; I’m in a happy, committed relationship, moved out, learnt to drive, started (and ended!) my own music publication, created my blog and worked my way up to my dream job. I’m more accomplished, level-headed, hard-working, ambitious, sociable and confident than the person in that photo. I’m more comfortable with my body and appearance than I’ve ever been, regardless of my size.

I’m a better person for so, so many reasons right now, and it all has absolutely zilch to do with my weight.

I’m lucky enough that I can see that, despite falling down the rabbit hole every now and again. But all the while we give into this narrative that being fat is the worst thing you can be, and the only way to make yourself a better person is to lose weight, then this narrative will continue to win and companies like Weight Watchers will keep making these shitty adverts.



Finding Your Feet & Fitting In At Work | #ThisGirlEats

We all have times when we feel a little uncomfortable in our own skin. It’s hard to always feel like yourself, especially when you’re environment you aren’t used to with people you don’t know. It happens to some of us more than others, but I think it’s pretty much a universally accepted fact that trying to fit in and find your feet in a new job is always a challenge.

After being yelled at down the phone by strangers every day, I finally decided call centre work just wasn’t for me (although who on earth is it “for”?!) and applied for a few other positions, including one at a big, scary London office that I was well under-qualified for. But I thought, hey, what the hell?!

After that I thought practically nothing of it; I can’t even COUNT the amount of times I’ve sent off job applications and never heard back. It’s like they’d get lost in some sort of internet void as soon as I’d hit the ‘Send’ button. When this application was even acknowledged it was a surprise, so you can imagine my shock when I actually interviewed and then went and got the damn thing!

I was excited, happy and proud of myself but, of course, also anxious and nervous. It sounds mad, but it wasn’t the fact that I had zero experience, loads to learn or even the thought that I might not be very good that worried me about starting a new job; it was the thought of having to try and feel like I belonged all over again.

Before work picture in black peplum top and tartan skirt

When you’ve worked somewhere for a long time, it almost becomes your home away from home, right? We often refer to our colleagues as our “work family” and, sadly, many of us spend more time at work than we do anywhere else! You find yourself settling in, you realise who you get on with (and who you don’t!) and you pick up on all the little quirks of the place.

For me, the social cues of every workplace are different, and it’s figuring those out that often make it hard to feel like I fit in. I’m incredibly socially awkward and I get hugely anxious when meeting new people, especially in an office where the social side of things usually comes with so many unspoken rules.

I’ve only ever worked in small teams and casual environments, so moving up to a fancy London office with these equally fancy people was so nerve-wracking for me. There I was, being introduced to these slender, sophisticated women and suited-and-booted men, shuffling around in my Converses and talking about festivals with my skull tattoo creeping out of my sleeve…

Pink, blue and yellow sugar skull tattoo

I looked different. I felt different.

No matter where you are, whether it’s a corporate head office or a small team out in the sticks, a new job can sometimes feel like a whole new world. It’s still early doors for me so, if I’m honest, I still don’t think I’ve found my place just yet.

All I can do is think back to one of my earlier jobs, when I’d walk around the block at least twice every single day before going inside because I was so nervous about fitting in – and then think about how much I loved them all by the time I left. It takes time, but hopefully one day I’ll look back on how I felt at this point and laugh at myself because, now, it finally feels like home.

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Healing My Unhealthy Relationship with Food | #ThisGirlEats

Me and food, we’ve got a love-hate relationship. Sometimes it’s my best friend, sometimes it’s my enemy. The problem is, no matter how unhealthy my relationship with food might be, I need it to, y’unno, stay alive. That’s the bottom line, right?

I’ve got an ongoing battle between my love of food and the issues it causes me when it comes to weight, body image and self-consciousness. It’s something I’ve never known how to overcome and, truthfully, never thought I could.

But lately something has changed. I don’t know if it’s the conscious effort I’ve been spending on positive self-image, the incredible body positive women I follow online, or just the fact that I’ve coloured my hair recently and it looks great (not even gonna lie). We all know that when a gal changes her hair some serious shit is going down!

Pink and purple hair

Point is, even though I’m probably at my biggest right now, have stretch marks all over my body and took an incredibly lax approach to shaving my legs this winter, I have been feeling so much more positive about myself, my body and my relationship with food. My mind is like a sat nav, healing my deep-rooted problems with food and rerouting itself down a much better path.

I think this revelation started when I read Ruby Tandoh’s ‘Eat Up’ last summer. It made me start to listen to my body and really enjoy food instead of always fighting against it – you can read more about my thoughts on the book here.

Since then, I’ve definitely realised how negative it is to think some foods are “bad” and that I should feel “guilty” for eating, and that really made a difference.

For example, when me and my boyfriend go out to eat now it’s not about feeling bad for the three-course meal we’ve devoured and how we have to pop open the top button on our jeans on the car ride home. It’s about the quality time we spent together; the laughs we had trying to order items from the menu we couldn’t pronounce, the ideas we came up with for the future while dipping dough balls into garlic butter, the holiday we planned over a margherita pizza, the content quiet between us as we savoured delectable, sweet spoonfuls of chocolate ice cream.

Pizza Express margherita pizza
Pizza Express margherita pizza

It’s about getting out of the house and enjoying what life has to offer. It’s about loving food and company and conversation. It’s about caring for ourselves and nourishing our bodies, minds and souls. It’s about looking after relationships with each other, with ourselves, with food.

I currently have the healthiest view of food and myself that I’ve had in a long, long time. I don’t really know how it happened, or why it’s happening right now. But it is, and I’m happy.

I Have a Love-Hate Relationship with Summer | #ThisGirlEats

If you asked me ten years ago what my favourite time of year was, I definitely would’ve said summer.

That probably had something to do with still being in school and getting six weeks off for summer hols, but also because summer has always been my go-to fave ☀️ I hate the cold weather, the rain and the snow, but I bloody love the sunshine, the feeling of warmth on your skin, the light evenings. But since my precious summer holidays have been taken away and I’ve had to face up to the harsh realities of summer as an adult (seriously, who do I speak to about getting mandatory seasonal breaks for grown-ups?) I’m starting to find myself developing more of a love-hate relationship with summer.

The dark, gloomy winter months suck. They do. But there’s something lovely about cosying up in your biggest, snuggliest jumper, walking through town under their (slightly shit) Christmas lights and curling up with a blanket eating comfort food and watching telly. Yes, I’m aware I sound about 80 right now but it’s just nice, isn’t it?

sweatpants gif

As I’ve got older, I’m leaning more towards these winter nights than the summer days I once adored. Gone are endless beach days and lazing about for hours turning gradually lobster red; now most of my summer is spent in a stuffy office with the WORST air con in the world, never being able to decide what to wear because getting my legs out gives me heart palpitations and I always forget to paint my toenails, and sitting upstairs in the flat complaining that we don’t have a garden.

This year more than ever, I’ve put on a little weight (I guess that’s what happens when you go from running about in retail all day to sitting your butt on an office chair, only getting up for lunch breaks and to pee) and the summer has become a struggle.

I have endless love for curvy,  plus size women who absolutely rock their summer dresses and bikinis with an awesome confidence – these babes look beautiful! 😍 They’re definite proof that just because you’ve got a little extra meat on your bones doesn’t mean you can’t flash the flesh in the summer, but I’m just not there yet. I don’t have the self-confidence, especially as revisiting my mostly-too-small summer wardrobe made me feel even worse about myself! I’m surrounded by girls wearing short skirts, cute sandals, pretty dresses, but it’s just not me. Not right now, anyway.

nothing to wear

One good thing has come out of this summer – it’s given me fresh new motivation to get fit and lose the weight I’ve gained, because I cannot go through this again. It’s just too depressing! This time next year I want to be able to pluck out my favourite summer clothes and fit into them with ease. Not too much to ask, right? I’ve needed something to kick me into action because my “get-up-and-go” has been virtually non-existent lately and has resulted in many, many ill-advised takeaways…

So yes, this year I’m loving the sunshine but hating the fact that I have to choose between showing off my body or melting in the heat and am kinda looking forward to covering up in jeans and jumpers again. But hopefully next summer you’ll see me back to rocking my grunger shorts, blink-182 vests and Hell Bunny dresses with a smile on my face.

Stop Letting Clothes Size Labels Take Over Your Life | #ThisGirlEats

Ask a woman her clothes size and you’ll NEVER get a straight answer.

If you were expecting a simple, “Oh, I’m a size 10,” then boy, are you in for a treat! You’re more likely to hear something along the lines of, “Well my top half is a size 14, but my bottom half is more like a size 16 and even then some jeans don’t fit over my bum, although in one shop I can get into a size 12, but in this other shop I always buy a size bigger…” It can go on. And on. And on.

It’s not our fault! Shops have to take responsibility here for doing some serious damage to our self-image. We all know we shouldn’t let a label dictate our self-confidence but if we’re all trying to push the body positive movement then the high street should help us along the way, right?

mean girls gif dress sears

There’s never going to be a ‘one size fits all’; I don’t expect every single store to be completely coherent. Some bras will always fit a bit better, some jeans will always pinch our tummies a little less (and yes, I’m gonna keep coming back to jeans because they are the WORST!). But let’s be honest, it sucks when you feel confident enough in your clothes size to buy from a new online store, try it all on at home and find that NONE of it fits. Why? This is your size, right? All your other clothes are this size and fit just fine.

Unless… have they just stretched to fit you? Have you put on weight without even noticing? Uh oh…

It’s even worse when you’re already unhappy with your size. When I gain weight the hands-down worst part is shifting up a clothes size. It’s a physical reminder that YOU’VE GOT FAT. Ugh. When you shop somewhere and fit into your dream size, it’s awesome 🎉 but when you go elsewhere and have to go up three sizes just to fit your calves into their skinny jeans, it feels rubbish. It leaves us very confused about our bodies, but it shouldn’t!

bridget jones pants

Who cares about numbers on a label? We just throw them away anyway! We know that sizes mean NOTHING because you can be a size 12 in one shop and a size 18 in another, but either way you’re still YOU, whether you’re wearing a size 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20, 22… you get the idea. The important thing is that you feel comfortable in your clothes, and your skin; wear things that look good, that make you feel good. No-one needs to know what size you’re wearing, and no-one cares – all they see is a gorgeous gal in a bangin’ outfit! Find clothes that look great and forget about those stupid labels – I’m pretty sure they make up those numbers anyway!

Sometimes My Confidence Gets In The Way of Supporting Other Women, and It SUCKS. Am I Alone? | #ThisGirlEats

Let me be super clear here; I love women and I love supporting them. I’m not saying for one second that I can’t or don’t support other women, I’m just being honest: I don’t always find it easy. Or at least, as easy as social media would have us believe.

I honestly love supporting the women around me. My family, my friends, my colleagues, other bloggers, I think you’re all fantastic and I’m so, so proud of every one of you. But when you haven’t got much confidence in yourself, it’s really hard to silence that self-loathing envy, and it’s difficult not to feel that the achievements of others reflect your own shortcomings. Trust me, that says more about myself than it does anyone else!

We’re living in crucial times; as a woman today, it’s SO important to be supportive. To be there for each other, to fight for each other, to promote each other and to understand each other. We should all be basking in the glow of each other’s fabulousness! It makes me feel like the worst feminist ever to admit that I don’t always find that easy.


Is that okay? Am I allowed?

Sometimes, when I look at myself and feel a bit squishy – let’s say I’m hopelessly trying to squeeze into my jeans again or whatever – my confidence is at its lowest. Self-doubt plagues my mind and clouds my judgement. Then I see a lovely lady showing off her weight loss on Instagram, or a group of girls all going out looking a million bucks, or a blogger posting a “candid” shot that looks absolutely stunning while in all my candids I look like a potato.

I want to be supportive. I want to congratulate her on losing the weight, I want to ask those girls where they got their outfits because they look awesome, I want to comment on the photo and ask for photography tips. But I also feel like chucking my phone across the room and throwing a strop like a toddler because I’m annoyed. Not at them, but at myself. I’m mad at myself because I can’t do those things, or I don’t like look that, or I haven’t achieved those goals. It’s silly, it’s selfish, but it’s true.

Of course, I don’t say this (until now!). I smile, and I say well done to all the smart, confident, beautiful, hard-working, brave, funny, ambitious, sexy, relentless, fierce women I know because, let’s face it, they’re all bloody wonderful.

I’ll say it again – it’s so, so, so important for us girls to stick together and support each other, to lift each other up instead of tearing each other down. But I think it’s also important to acknowledge that overcoming our own insecurities to do so can be difficult for some of us. But that just proves how strong us women can be for each other, right?

Pobody’s Nerfect – You Ain’t No Princess, But You Ain’t a Pauper Either. Stop Putting Yourself Down! | #ThisGirlEats

Sometimes, you just have to be honest with yourself.

Our own perspectives can be so bloody warped; some people delude themselves with a sense of self-importance and entitlement, overstepping the boundaries of self-love into totally fucking annoying. Others beat themselves down so much that it doesn’t matter how many lovely, wonderful qualities they possess, they’ve clouded their own reflection beyond repair.

You might be at either end of the spectrum, but the reality is that most of us are somewhere in between. You might think you’re the bees knees, or you might have rock-bottom self-esteem, but truth is you’re actually probably somewhere in the middle.

We’re all drama queens at heart and like to think we’re only ever one extreme or the other, but I’ve decided now is the time to make myself face up to the cold, hard truth.

And this is it: You’re alright.


That’s it. I might not be some spectacular, all-singing, all-dancing superstar. I might not be totally happy with everything I see when I look in the mirror. I might still be stumbling around at the bottom of the career ladder without really knowing which rung to start climbing. I might not have much money, or the most exciting social life, or own my flat, or have millions of blog views. But it’s time I got over myself, because I really don’t have it all that bad.

I’m healthy. When I look in the mirror, yes, I moan, but I know it’s just superficial shit. I’m lucky enough to just be “normal”. Some people wake up every day wishing they could be “normal”. It’s a privilege and certainly not to be sniffed at.

My career is still something of a question mark but, with my generation, I’m sure as hell not alone there! I managed to escape from a job I hated last year, which was a big, big step. And at least I have a job! I should be counting my lucky stars for that.

I’m a bit skint, but I’m hardly living in poverty.

I’ve got lovely friends and family, and with that lot there’s definitely enough going on to keep me busy!

I don’t own my home, but at least I’m paying rent to a landlord and not my parents – independence is invaluable to me.

And, damn it, I’m proud of the content I create. I have faith that my blog will be good enough to eventually bring in the views on its own merit, without having to create a fake Instagram life for fake followers.

I’d be lying if I said I was going to wake up every morning with some newfound confidence and live out every day totally and wholly loving myself. It’s just not realistic. But whenever I’m feeling low or having doubts, I’ll repeat the wise words of Eleanor Shellstrop. Honey, pobody’s nerfect. You’re alright, and that is alright.

pobodys nerfect.gif

Turn Your Frown Upside Down – How Seeing the Positives in Others Can Do Wonders For Your Own Self-Confidence

I’ve talked about what a bitch that little voice in your head can be. You know, the one that just loves to narrate your life with a running inner-monologue of self-doubt and anxiety. It makes us guilty of comparing ourselves to others, and also of judging others – ironic, isn’t is, as we usually fear that’s what people are doing to us?

morticia gif

We’re all to blame. It’s easy to think, “why don’t I have hair/teeth/boobs/legs like that?” and, yes, that damages our self-esteem. But it’s just as easy to think, “Thank goodness I DON’T have hair/teeth/boobs/legs like that!” Both are just as negative; you’re either trashing yourself – which, btw, you don’t deserve – or becoming part of the same endless cycle that makes you feel so rubbish in the first place!

Nipping that voice in the bud is hard. It can feel like you need some sort of spoon-bending, Professor X-level mind power to silence it. You might not be able to turn it off completely (if you do, can you write some kind of self-help book for the rest of us please?) but maybe you could turn it around…

When you see someone – just a random stranger, anyone really – and you hear that voice start to creep up, change it’s tune. Take control. Make a positive affirmation about that person which reflects negatively on no-one. Pause, look at them and find something positive. There’s always something positive!

compliment gif

Instead of thinking, “Oh god, she’s owning the room like a glamour model and here I am looking like a sack of potatoes…” just take a second to evaluate your own self-worth. You don’t need to hear that. You don’t have to put that kind of pressure of yourself.


Think, “Wow, I really like that shade of lipstick she’s wearing, it looks gorgeous. That’d really suit me, maybe I should look for something similar.”

Instead of thinking, “Jeez, who let her leave the house in that outfit this morning?!” just take a second to consider their feelings. Consider how it’d make you feel. They don’t deserve that kind of judgement. By inflicting it upon them, aren’t you just spreading more of the same negativity that you’re so afraid of yourself? Think, “Wow, look at that lanyard around her neck! If she works there she must have an AMAZING job! Good for her!”

meryl streep gif

It’s not a fix-it-all solution, and OF COURSE our self-worth often runs deeper than these superficial thoughts. But it’s about putting a stop to the negativity. You know the saying, if you haven’t got anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all? Well, it’s the same with our thoughts. If you can’t think of something positive about someone, just leave it alone. But if we can all spread little nuggets of happy, sunny loveliness, our days would be more bearable. Trust me, you’ll feel a million times better for it!

mean girls gif

“Wow, She Looks Really-“ No. Stop Right There. | #ThisGirlEats

bridget jones gif

You can be your own worst enemy. No, not because you still drunk dial your ex every Saturday night. Not because you see that pile of dirty knickers piling up in the corner of your bedroom every morning and still can’t be arsed to put them in the wash (you can always buy new ones anyway). 🙊

But it’s that little voice in your head. That little voice, the one that convinces you to conquer your fears and feeds you those witty one-liners, can turn on you. I’ll put my hand up and admit that when I’m not paying attention, perhaps daydreaming at work or getting lost in my headphones, it finds a way to creep in, especially when I see other women.

I am NOT one for girl-hate. Turning your back on your fellow ladies just because you think also having girlie bits makes them some kind of threat? Forget it. But I am a sucker for girl-envy – very different. When I’m not keeping my mind on a tight leash, it gets all carried away, like a puppy peeing on a lamp post. It’s got some kind of high-tech Mission Impossible crap going on, zeroing into the nearest woman, zooming in on some aspect of her appearance and comparing it to my own – without my permission!

Before I know it, I’m examining whether that random lady buying some loo roll in Tesco has a slimmer waist than me. What’s that all about?!

amy big bang gif

It can spark up some pretty negative thoughts because, let’s face it, who enjoys putting themselves down? And, even worse, who wants to be thinking negative things about (probably) perfectly nice, normal strangers? It’s unfair, it’s unnecessary, and it’s downright toxic for your own mental health and confidence.

It can be super difficult to overcome. I know I’ve told myself a million times to shut out that annoying little voice, but it’s not always easy.

But let’s all work a little harder to give it a go, shall we? Next time you start to use someone else’s looks – or actions, or achievements – to drag yourself down, remind yourself that it is not cool. It’s not going to make you feel any better or worse in the long-run; all it’s gonna do is damage your own self-confidence and make you a more bitter, cranky person. And no-one wants that!be positive selfie