Finding Your Feet & Fitting In At Work | #ThisGirlEats

We all have times when we feel a little uncomfortable in our own skin. It’s hard to always feel like yourself, especially when you’re environment you aren’t used to with people you don’t know. It happens to some of us more than others, but I think it’s pretty much a universally accepted fact that trying to fit in and find your feet in a new job is always a challenge.

After being yelled at down the phone by strangers every day, I finally decided call centre work just wasn’t for me (although who on earth is it “for”?!) and applied for a few other positions, including one at a big, scary London office that I was well under-qualified for. But I thought, hey, what the hell?!

After that I thought practically nothing of it; I can’t even COUNT the amount of times I’ve sent off job applications and never heard back. It’s like they’d get lost in some sort of internet void as soon as I’d hit the ‘Send’ button. When this application was even acknowledged it was a surprise, so you can imagine my shock when I actually interviewed and then went and got the damn thing!

I was excited, happy and proud of myself but, of course, also anxious and nervous. It sounds mad, but it wasn’t the fact that I had zero experience, loads to learn or even the thought that I might not be very good that worried me about starting a new job; it was the thought of having to try and feel like I belonged all over again.

Before work picture in black peplum top and tartan skirt

When you’ve worked somewhere for a long time, it almost becomes your home away from home, right? We often refer to our colleagues as our “work family” and, sadly, many of us spend more time at work than we do anywhere else! You find yourself settling in, you realise who you get on with (and who you don’t!) and you pick up on all the little quirks of the place.

For me, the social cues of every workplace are different, and it’s figuring those out that often make it hard to feel like I fit in. I’m incredibly socially awkward and I get hugely anxious when meeting new people, especially in an office where the social side of things usually comes with so many unspoken rules.

I’ve only ever worked in small teams and casual environments, so moving up to a fancy London office with these equally fancy people was so nerve-wracking for me. There I was, being introduced to these slender, sophisticated women and suited-and-booted men, shuffling around in my Converses and talking about festivals with my skull tattoo creeping out of my sleeve…

Pink, blue and yellow sugar skull tattoo

I looked different. I felt different.

No matter where you are, whether it’s a corporate head office or a small team out in the sticks, a new job can sometimes feel like a whole new world. It’s still early doors for me so, if I’m honest, I still don’t think I’ve found my place just yet.

All I can do is think back to one of my earlier jobs, when I’d walk around the block at least twice every single day before going inside because I was so nervous about fitting in – and then think about how much I loved them all by the time I left. It takes time, but hopefully one day I’ll look back on how I felt at this point and laugh at myself because, now, it finally feels like home.

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25 Things That 25-Year-Old Me Would Tell My Younger Self


What Makes Me Feel Like “Me”? | #ThisGirlEats

I don’t know what it is but, lately, I just haven’t felt like myself. I don’t know if anyone else ever feels this way – you can’t quite put your finger on it, nothing particularly noticeable, there’s no real reason for it, but you just feel… different. Something isn’t quite right, not quite “you”. While mooching around at home feeling confused and lethargic of course has been super fun, I’m trying to pull myself out of this funk.

I’ve been thinking about how to do that. I’ve spent time recalling things that really make me feel like myself, things that really draw my most familiar self to the surface. They’re usually little things, no grand gestures but just small, seemingly insignificant habits that make me feel like myself. And this little list is what I came up with!

Wearing a full face of make up 💄
Maybe it’s vein, but how you look and, more importantly, how you feel when you look in the mirror can really play with your emotions. I used to wear make up everyday but, since working in an office, I don’t paint my face at all in the week. Although I’m quite comfortable with that most of the time, when the weekend rolls around and I do my make up properly it’s like looking at someone I truly recognise, and that feels great.

Listening to my favourite music – mostly pop-punk
I know everyone says, “Ooh, I like all kinds of music!” (You like all kinds of music do you Susan? How about some early ‘00s trap music? Or have you ever heard of Babymetal..?) but I really do like a good variety, from nu-metal to showtunes. But my absolute favourite, even after all these years, is pop-punk. I’ve loved it since I was 13 and, yeah, maybe I should’ve grown out of it by now, but it reminds me of who I am, and who I’ve always been, and nothing makes me feel surer of myself.

jarred gif

Laughing REALLY loud
Laughter is the best medicine, that’s what they say. I’m not sure if laughter really can cure everything, I think it’s invaluable when it comes to boosting our mood. We never really know the benefits of a good laugh until we’re there, doubled over, guffawing big belly laughs, tears streaming down our faces. Is there anything better? 😂😂😂

Going to a gig and losing my mind
Even though I barely have the 1) time, 2) money or 3) energy to go to many gigs these days (my uni schedule was honestly such a gift…) it’s still my favourite thing in the world to do. I can’t think of anything better than going to see a band I really love, yelling out every word, throwing myself around to every beat, and just having fun. It’s probably the most “me” place I could be.

Watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Not only is this one of my favourite films, but it’s also a fabulous, high-heeled riot all about liberation, freedom and being thoroughly yourself. Whenever I watch it, I feel most in tune with who I am and what I love. It gives me a sense of inspiration unlike anything else.

rocky horror

I Have a Love-Hate Relationship with Summer | #ThisGirlEats

If you asked me ten years ago what my favourite time of year was, I definitely would’ve said summer.

That probably had something to do with still being in school and getting six weeks off for summer hols, but also because summer has always been my go-to fave ☀️ I hate the cold weather, the rain and the snow, but I bloody love the sunshine, the feeling of warmth on your skin, the light evenings. But since my precious summer holidays have been taken away and I’ve had to face up to the harsh realities of summer as an adult (seriously, who do I speak to about getting mandatory seasonal breaks for grown-ups?) I’m starting to find myself developing more of a love-hate relationship with summer.

The dark, gloomy winter months suck. They do. But there’s something lovely about cosying up in your biggest, snuggliest jumper, walking through town under their (slightly shit) Christmas lights and curling up with a blanket eating comfort food and watching telly. Yes, I’m aware I sound about 80 right now but it’s just nice, isn’t it?

sweatpants gif

As I’ve got older, I’m leaning more towards these winter nights than the summer days I once adored. Gone are endless beach days and lazing about for hours turning gradually lobster red; now most of my summer is spent in a stuffy office with the WORST air con in the world, never being able to decide what to wear because getting my legs out gives me heart palpitations and I always forget to paint my toenails, and sitting upstairs in the flat complaining that we don’t have a garden.

This year more than ever, I’ve put on a little weight (I guess that’s what happens when you go from running about in retail all day to sitting your butt on an office chair, only getting up for lunch breaks and to pee) and the summer has become a struggle.

I have endless love for curvy,  plus size women who absolutely rock their summer dresses and bikinis with an awesome confidence – these babes look beautiful! 😍 They’re definite proof that just because you’ve got a little extra meat on your bones doesn’t mean you can’t flash the flesh in the summer, but I’m just not there yet. I don’t have the self-confidence, especially as revisiting my mostly-too-small summer wardrobe made me feel even worse about myself! I’m surrounded by girls wearing short skirts, cute sandals, pretty dresses, but it’s just not me. Not right now, anyway.

nothing to wear

One good thing has come out of this summer – it’s given me fresh new motivation to get fit and lose the weight I’ve gained, because I cannot go through this again. It’s just too depressing! This time next year I want to be able to pluck out my favourite summer clothes and fit into them with ease. Not too much to ask, right? I’ve needed something to kick me into action because my “get-up-and-go” has been virtually non-existent lately and has resulted in many, many ill-advised takeaways…

So yes, this year I’m loving the sunshine but hating the fact that I have to choose between showing off my body or melting in the heat and am kinda looking forward to covering up in jeans and jumpers again. But hopefully next summer you’ll see me back to rocking my grunger shorts, blink-182 vests and Hell Bunny dresses with a smile on my face.

Stop Letting Clothes Size Labels Take Over Your Life | #ThisGirlEats

Ask a woman her clothes size and you’ll NEVER get a straight answer.

If you were expecting a simple, “Oh, I’m a size 10,” then boy, are you in for a treat! You’re more likely to hear something along the lines of, “Well my top half is a size 14, but my bottom half is more like a size 16 and even then some jeans don’t fit over my bum, although in one shop I can get into a size 12, but in this other shop I always buy a size bigger…” It can go on. And on. And on.

It’s not our fault! Shops have to take responsibility here for doing some serious damage to our self-image. We all know we shouldn’t let a label dictate our self-confidence but if we’re all trying to push the body positive movement then the high street should help us along the way, right?

mean girls gif dress sears

There’s never going to be a ‘one size fits all’; I don’t expect every single store to be completely coherent. Some bras will always fit a bit better, some jeans will always pinch our tummies a little less (and yes, I’m gonna keep coming back to jeans because they are the WORST!). But let’s be honest, it sucks when you feel confident enough in your clothes size to buy from a new online store, try it all on at home and find that NONE of it fits. Why? This is your size, right? All your other clothes are this size and fit just fine.

Unless… have they just stretched to fit you? Have you put on weight without even noticing? Uh oh…

It’s even worse when you’re already unhappy with your size. When I gain weight the hands-down worst part is shifting up a clothes size. It’s a physical reminder that YOU’VE GOT FAT. Ugh. When you shop somewhere and fit into your dream size, it’s awesome 🎉 but when you go elsewhere and have to go up three sizes just to fit your calves into their skinny jeans, it feels rubbish. It leaves us very confused about our bodies, but it shouldn’t!

bridget jones pants

Who cares about numbers on a label? We just throw them away anyway! We know that sizes mean NOTHING because you can be a size 12 in one shop and a size 18 in another, but either way you’re still YOU, whether you’re wearing a size 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20, 22… you get the idea. The important thing is that you feel comfortable in your clothes, and your skin; wear things that look good, that make you feel good. No-one needs to know what size you’re wearing, and no-one cares – all they see is a gorgeous gal in a bangin’ outfit! Find clothes that look great and forget about those stupid labels – I’m pretty sure they make up those numbers anyway!

Sometimes My Confidence Gets In The Way of Supporting Other Women, and It SUCKS. Am I Alone? | #ThisGirlEats

Let me be super clear here; I love women and I love supporting them. I’m not saying for one second that I can’t or don’t support other women, I’m just being honest: I don’t always find it easy. Or at least, as easy as social media would have us believe.

I honestly love supporting the women around me. My family, my friends, my colleagues, other bloggers, I think you’re all fantastic and I’m so, so proud of every one of you. But when you haven’t got much confidence in yourself, it’s really hard to silence that self-loathing envy, and it’s difficult not to feel that the achievements of others reflect your own shortcomings. Trust me, that says more about myself than it does anyone else!

We’re living in crucial times; as a woman today, it’s SO important to be supportive. To be there for each other, to fight for each other, to promote each other and to understand each other. We should all be basking in the glow of each other’s fabulousness! It makes me feel like the worst feminist ever to admit that I don’t always find that easy.


Is that okay? Am I allowed?

Sometimes, when I look at myself and feel a bit squishy – let’s say I’m hopelessly trying to squeeze into my jeans again or whatever – my confidence is at its lowest. Self-doubt plagues my mind and clouds my judgement. Then I see a lovely lady showing off her weight loss on Instagram, or a group of girls all going out looking a million bucks, or a blogger posting a “candid” shot that looks absolutely stunning while in all my candids I look like a potato.

I want to be supportive. I want to congratulate her on losing the weight, I want to ask those girls where they got their outfits because they look awesome, I want to comment on the photo and ask for photography tips. But I also feel like chucking my phone across the room and throwing a strop like a toddler because I’m annoyed. Not at them, but at myself. I’m mad at myself because I can’t do those things, or I don’t like look that, or I haven’t achieved those goals. It’s silly, it’s selfish, but it’s true.

Of course, I don’t say this (until now!). I smile, and I say well done to all the smart, confident, beautiful, hard-working, brave, funny, ambitious, sexy, relentless, fierce women I know because, let’s face it, they’re all bloody wonderful.

I’ll say it again – it’s so, so, so important for us girls to stick together and support each other, to lift each other up instead of tearing each other down. But I think it’s also important to acknowledge that overcoming our own insecurities to do so can be difficult for some of us. But that just proves how strong us women can be for each other, right?

Pobody’s Nerfect – You Ain’t No Princess, But You Ain’t a Pauper Either. Stop Putting Yourself Down! | #ThisGirlEats

Sometimes, you just have to be honest with yourself.

Our own perspectives can be so bloody warped; some people delude themselves with a sense of self-importance and entitlement, overstepping the boundaries of self-love into totally fucking annoying. Others beat themselves down so much that it doesn’t matter how many lovely, wonderful qualities they possess, they’ve clouded their own reflection beyond repair.

You might be at either end of the spectrum, but the reality is that most of us are somewhere in between. You might think you’re the bees knees, or you might have rock-bottom self-esteem, but truth is you’re actually probably somewhere in the middle.

We’re all drama queens at heart and like to think we’re only ever one extreme or the other, but I’ve decided now is the time to make myself face up to the cold, hard truth.

And this is it: You’re alright.


That’s it. I might not be some spectacular, all-singing, all-dancing superstar. I might not be totally happy with everything I see when I look in the mirror. I might still be stumbling around at the bottom of the career ladder without really knowing which rung to start climbing. I might not have much money, or the most exciting social life, or own my flat, or have millions of blog views. But it’s time I got over myself, because I really don’t have it all that bad.

I’m healthy. When I look in the mirror, yes, I moan, but I know it’s just superficial shit. I’m lucky enough to just be “normal”. Some people wake up every day wishing they could be “normal”. It’s a privilege and certainly not to be sniffed at.

My career is still something of a question mark but, with my generation, I’m sure as hell not alone there! I managed to escape from a job I hated last year, which was a big, big step. And at least I have a job! I should be counting my lucky stars for that.

I’m a bit skint, but I’m hardly living in poverty.

I’ve got lovely friends and family, and with that lot there’s definitely enough going on to keep me busy!

I don’t own my home, but at least I’m paying rent to a landlord and not my parents – independence is invaluable to me.

And, damn it, I’m proud of the content I create. I have faith that my blog will be good enough to eventually bring in the views on its own merit, without having to create a fake Instagram life for fake followers.

I’d be lying if I said I was going to wake up every morning with some newfound confidence and live out every day totally and wholly loving myself. It’s just not realistic. But whenever I’m feeling low or having doubts, I’ll repeat the wise words of Eleanor Shellstrop. Honey, pobody’s nerfect. You’re alright, and that is alright.

pobodys nerfect.gif

Turn Your Frown Upside Down – How Seeing the Positives in Others Can Do Wonders For Your Own Self-Confidence

I’ve talked about what a bitch that little voice in your head can be. You know, the one that just loves to narrate your life with a running inner-monologue of self-doubt and anxiety. It makes us guilty of comparing ourselves to others, and also of judging others – ironic, isn’t is, as we usually fear that’s what people are doing to us?

morticia gif

We’re all to blame. It’s easy to think, “why don’t I have hair/teeth/boobs/legs like that?” and, yes, that damages our self-esteem. But it’s just as easy to think, “Thank goodness I DON’T have hair/teeth/boobs/legs like that!” Both are just as negative; you’re either trashing yourself – which, btw, you don’t deserve – or becoming part of the same endless cycle that makes you feel so rubbish in the first place!

Nipping that voice in the bud is hard. It can feel like you need some sort of spoon-bending, Professor X-level mind power to silence it. You might not be able to turn it off completely (if you do, can you write some kind of self-help book for the rest of us please?) but maybe you could turn it around…

When you see someone – just a random stranger, anyone really – and you hear that voice start to creep up, change it’s tune. Take control. Make a positive affirmation about that person which reflects negatively on no-one. Pause, look at them and find something positive. There’s always something positive!

compliment gif

Instead of thinking, “Oh god, she’s owning the room like a glamour model and here I am looking like a sack of potatoes…” just take a second to evaluate your own self-worth. You don’t need to hear that. You don’t have to put that kind of pressure of yourself.


Think, “Wow, I really like that shade of lipstick she’s wearing, it looks gorgeous. That’d really suit me, maybe I should look for something similar.”

Instead of thinking, “Jeez, who let her leave the house in that outfit this morning?!” just take a second to consider their feelings. Consider how it’d make you feel. They don’t deserve that kind of judgement. By inflicting it upon them, aren’t you just spreading more of the same negativity that you’re so afraid of yourself? Think, “Wow, look at that lanyard around her neck! If she works there she must have an AMAZING job! Good for her!”

meryl streep gif

It’s not a fix-it-all solution, and OF COURSE our self-worth often runs deeper than these superficial thoughts. But it’s about putting a stop to the negativity. You know the saying, if you haven’t got anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all? Well, it’s the same with our thoughts. If you can’t think of something positive about someone, just leave it alone. But if we can all spread little nuggets of happy, sunny loveliness, our days would be more bearable. Trust me, you’ll feel a million times better for it!

mean girls gif

“Wow, She Looks Really-“ No. Stop Right There. | #ThisGirlEats

bridget jones gif

You can be your own worst enemy. No, not because you still drunk dial your ex every Saturday night. Not because you see that pile of dirty knickers piling up in the corner of your bedroom every morning and still can’t be arsed to put them in the wash (you can always buy new ones anyway). 🙊

But it’s that little voice in your head. That little voice, the one that convinces you to conquer your fears and feeds you those witty one-liners, can turn on you. I’ll put my hand up and admit that when I’m not paying attention, perhaps daydreaming at work or getting lost in my headphones, it finds a way to creep in, especially when I see other women.

I am NOT one for girl-hate. Turning your back on your fellow ladies just because you think also having girlie bits makes them some kind of threat? Forget it. But I am a sucker for girl-envy – very different. When I’m not keeping my mind on a tight leash, it gets all carried away, like a puppy peeing on a lamp post. It’s got some kind of high-tech Mission Impossible crap going on, zeroing into the nearest woman, zooming in on some aspect of her appearance and comparing it to my own – without my permission!

Before I know it, I’m examining whether that random lady buying some loo roll in Tesco has a slimmer waist than me. What’s that all about?!

amy big bang gif

It can spark up some pretty negative thoughts because, let’s face it, who enjoys putting themselves down? And, even worse, who wants to be thinking negative things about (probably) perfectly nice, normal strangers? It’s unfair, it’s unnecessary, and it’s downright toxic for your own mental health and confidence.

It can be super difficult to overcome. I know I’ve told myself a million times to shut out that annoying little voice, but it’s not always easy.

But let’s all work a little harder to give it a go, shall we? Next time you start to use someone else’s looks – or actions, or achievements – to drag yourself down, remind yourself that it is not cool. It’s not going to make you feel any better or worse in the long-run; all it’s gonna do is damage your own self-confidence and make you a more bitter, cranky person. And no-one wants that!be positive selfie

I Am Worthy: Learning to Cope with Being the Dreaded Wedding “Plus One” | #ThisGirlEats

Weddings are fun; a chance to tart yourself up, get disgustingly drunk and catch up with distant friends and relatives. The romantic joy of a newly-married couple (and getting a free meal on them) is great, as far as I’m concerned  


But it can be difficult if you’re there as the dreaded “Plus One”. Freaking out about how you look even more than usual, getting faaar too drunk out of blind fear (and, as a result, end up dancing like Neil out of The Inbetweeners – but worse) and dine out courtesy of people you barely know.

No? Just me?

I attended a wedding as a Plus One recently and, le’me tell you, it was fantastic. But once upon a time, such an occasion wouldn’t have gone so smoothly for me. The thought of trying to mingle with strangers for hours was the stuff of nightmares… like, Freddy Krueger level nightmares  

This time, I’m proud to say I handled it. Armed with a new positive outlook, I taught myself a mantra that got me through with newfound ease, chatting, drinking and feeling totally comfortable with my partner’s mates who have known him since he was a scruffy, boozed-up teenager – long before I straightened him out, obviously. (LIES – if anything, I’m a terrible influence!)

So, what was my mantra, you ask? Well, it’s just three simple words.

I am worthy.

That’s it. And it worked.

Don’t get me wrong, I had to say it a lot.

I said it as I agonised over my dress in the mirror, deciding between “oh, that’s a cute summer dress” and “inappropriately short for a wedding, you hussy”.

I said it when I realised I couldn’t walk in the heels I’d worn and I looked more like Bambi on ice than an elegant wedding guest.

I said it when I was introduced to strangers, intimidated by old friendships and tried to think of witty, intelligent dinner conversation.

But I said it.

Eventually, I felt comfortable with my outfit, just like many of the other gorgeous guests. I walked with pride (and clung onto my boyfriend’s arm) in my silly heels. I made polite small talk with strangers, played drinking games with our friends, and felt more relaxed than ever before.

So yeah, it turns out telling yourself you’re actually an alright person makes you feel like, you know, an alright person.

For those of you who are thinking, “What the hell?! I came here for food, not your life story!” – at the wedding meal, I had a goat’s cheese tart (I don’t like goat’s cheese), chicken and bacon in a deliciously creamy sauce with veg and roasties (amazing) and chocolate sponge (you can’t go wrong). So there!