About Me – #ThisGirlEats

I Am Worthy: Learning to Cope with Being the Dreaded Wedding “Plus One” | #ThisGirlEats

Weddings are fun; a chance to tart yourself up, get disgustingly drunk and catch up with distant friends and relatives. The romantic joy of a newly-married couple (and getting a free meal on them) is great, as far as I’m concerned

But it can be difficult if you’re there as the dreaded “Plus One”. Freaking out about how you look even more than usual, getting faaar too drunk out of blind fear (and, as a result, end up dancing like Neil out of The Inbetweeners – but worse) and dine out courtesy of people you barely know.

No? Just me?

I attended a wedding as a Plus One recently and, le’me tell you, it was fantastic. But once upon a time, such an occasion wouldn’t have gone so smoothly for me. The thought of trying to mingle with strangers for hours was the stuff of nightmares… like, Freddy Krueger level nightmares

This time, I’m proud to say I handled it. Armed with a new positive outlook, I taught myself a mantra that got me through with newfound ease, chatting, drinking and feeling totally comfortable with my partner’s mates who have known him since he was a scruffy, boozed-up teenager – long before I straightened him out, obviously. (LIES – if anything, I’m a terrible influence!)

So, what was my mantra, you ask? Well, it’s just three simple words.

I am worthy.

That’s it. And it worked.

Don’t get me wrong, I had to say it a lot.

I said it as I agonised over my dress in the mirror, deciding between “oh, that’s a cute summer dress” and “inappropriately short for a wedding, you hussy”.

I said it when I realised I couldn’t walk in the heels I’d worn and I looked more like Bambi on ice than an elegant wedding guest.

I said it when I was introduced to strangers, intimidated by old friendships and tried to think of witty, intelligent dinner conversation.

But I said it.

Eventually, I felt comfortable with my outfit, just like many of the other gorgeous guests. I walked with pride (and clung onto my boyfriend’s arm) in my silly heels. I made polite small talk with strangers, played drinking games with our friends, and felt more relaxed than ever before.

So yeah, it turns out telling yourself you’re actually an alright person makes you feel like, you know, an alright person.

For those of you who are thinking, “What the hell?! I came here for food, not your life story!” – at the wedding meal, I had a goat’s cheese tart (I don’t like goat’s cheese), chicken and bacon in a deliciously creamy sauce with veg and roasties (amazing) and chocolate sponge (you can’t go wrong). So there!

Fuck Shame: How This Blog Snubbed My Career-Shaming Habit (Yes, That’s a Thing) | #ThisGirlEats

Like a decent cuppa, #ThisGirlEats has been brewing for a long time. As it became less an idea and more a reality, my passion exploded and it was suddenly super important to me. It was like a new lease of life (is a mid-20s crisis a thing? It really should be) and I wanted to make it work.

If you’re sitting at home, perhaps feeling defeated, perhaps finding comfort in a bag of Kettle chips and a bottle of wine (no judgement here), wondering how a foodie blog that probably only my family and some very nice friends will ever read lifted me out of a similar funk, let me tell you…

I don’t like my job – I know; newsflash, I’m not the only one, bla bla bla. I mean, it’s not toooooo bad (‘cept rude customers, late nights and the absolute nightmare of Christmas retail, obviously), it’s just not my passion. And when you slog away day in, day out, at something you don’t feel any passion towards, it can get kinda depressing.

I’m SO guilty of letting my day job knock me back – I can’t count how many times I’ve come home feeling utterly rubbish. Still working at what I imagined to be a temporary stop-gap (HA HA HA) and not exactly making waves with my degree – or the £30,000 of debt I spent getting it! – led to endless hours punishing myself. I’d often turn a completely fine day into a living hell because I’d make myself feel so down about it.

But then I came up with this blog. Something to focus on, to aim for, to work on. Something exciting, motivating. It was a new adventure, the start of something. Once I realised that, everything else, including changing my negative mindset, just seemed to fall into place.

What was I criticising myself for? For being fortunate enough to have a job? For earning money, which allows me to have my own creative space, a decent laptop, and food to cook and experiment with? Is that really so awful? Isn’t that actually something to be proud of? Everyone who is successful, who I admire, has been in my shoes at some point. I’m a work in progress.

I thought having an “ordinary” retail job instead of being an award-winning journalist, music mogul or internet sensation of the blog-o-sphere made me unambitious, uncreative, underachieving. But did I look at my colleagues, doing the exact same job as me, that way? No. I saw them as funny, independent, interesting, creative, etc.. So why did I find it so hard to look at myself the same way?

We need to stop thinking that if we aren’t creating, organising, housekeeping, social media-ing, exercising, seeing friends and finding time to chill, all in one day, that it’s not a successful day. Productivity doesn’t have a time limit. The clock doesn’t refresh and start all over again after 24 hours. There’s no shame in working hard for bloody ages to get what you want. Fuck shame – take shame, disappointment and frustration into your own hands and mould it into inspiration, motivation, work ethic, passion, hunger.

Starting this blog gave me a bigger picture. It made me see my day job as a stepping stone rather than an obstacle. We are all a work in progress, and that’s okay.

#ThisGirlEats

#ThisGirlEats
Everyday food from an everyday girl.

I’m someone who loves food and loves to cook, but hates how difficult it can be to balance healthier choices with affordable, delicious food that I enjoy.

I’ve followed so many celebrities and health gurus over the years who talk about creating “normal meals” on a “normal budget” but, for me, they always inevitably end in disappointment when I realise this is food that I would never be able to fit into my normal working life with my tight budget.

I want to be more conscious of what I’m putting into my body – but I don’t want a life of kale smoothies, spelt flour and soya milk. I don’t want to cut out carbs, sugar or, God forbid, cheese. I don’t want to ban myself from ever eating a slice of pizza or a bar of chocolate again. I don’t want to change my entire lifestyle just for the sake of cutting a few calories!

I’m also a graduate with mounds of student debt and a retail job behind me, so it’s not like I have money to waste. Food that might be “affordable” to a celebrity chef certainly isn’t affordable for thousands of hard-working, bill-paying, money-saving people like myself. I want to be healthier, but I want to use the food in my cupboard and my usual weekly budget to do it.

#ThisGirlEats is about finding a healthier lifestyle in a truly realistic way, in a way that doesn’t break the bank and doesn’t change my whole life. So follow me as I work out some new recipes, discover helpful tips and try my best to make little differences that still fit into a normal lifestyle – but still stuff my face on the way!